“This” — Beyond Welcome and Not Welcome
Song: Just This
Daniel wanted a word that would solve things.
Not a complicated word.
He had collected enough of those.
He wanted one word that could hold the whole mess:
joy,
fear,
sadness,
anger,
preference,
story,
emptiness,
confusion,
the ache in the body,
the thought about tomorrow,
the strange peace after crying,
the memory that still made the stomach clench.
Elias said, “This.”
Daniel waited.
“That’s it?”
“That’s it.”
“That’s not very impressive.”
“No,” Elias said. “That’s why it works.”
Daniel tried it first with something easy.
A warm cup in his hands.
This.
Then with rain on the window.
This.
Then with a pleasant quiet in the chest.
This.
That was fine.
Then anxiety came later in the day, and he tried again.
This.
The mind objected.
No, not this. This is the thing we are trying to get past.
But the word did not argue.
It did not say yes.
It did not say no.
It did not say welcome.
It did not say unwelcome.
It did not say meaningful.
It did not say meaningless.
It simply pointed.
This.
Not as an answer.
As a refusal to leave the present.
Daniel began to understand.
“Welcome” was still a little bit outside experience.
It still implied someone at the door being generous.
“Acceptance” could still become a posture.
A spiritual face.
A subtle strategy.
But this was closer.
Before welcome.
Before rejection.
Before interpretation.
This.
The blanket thrown over everything, not to hide the details, but to stop pretending they had to be sorted into approved and unapproved piles.
This sadness.
This hand.
This resistance.
This breath.
This absurd thought.
This body.
This ordinary day.
This.
It was not dull.
It was bottomless.
Investigation: From Welcome to This
At first, it is useful to say:
“Can this be welcomed?”
That softens resistance.
But eventually even welcome may be seen as a subtle duality:
someone welcoming something.
There is still a host and a guest.
A door and a visitor.
An approved inclusion.
“This” is more immediate.
It does not mean liking.
It does not mean resignation.
It does not mean passivity.
It simply means:
what is here is here.
Before judgment:
this.
Before fixing:
this.
Before analysis:
this.
Before welcome or rejection:
this.
Clean formulation:
“This” is the simplest pointer because it does not explain, divide, approve, or reject. It includes pleasant and unpleasant experience without needing to turn either into a position.
'It simply pointed.
This.
Not as an answer.
As a refusal to leave the present.'
“This” is "it."
(It's the tits.)