Sophie had always assumed emotions happened to her. Anger was anger. Fear was fear. They arrived like weather — sudden, uncontrollable.
Today, though, she tried something different.
When the client’s rejection email arrived, her chest tightened, her stomach clenched, and heat flushed her face. The old story immediately played: They don’t respect me. This is so unfair.
Normally, she would run with that — replaying it, reinforcing it, fueling the anger. But recently, she’d learned something surprising: emotions aren’t hardwired reactions. They are built, moment by moment, by the brain.
Her brain was receiving raw signals from her body — tension, heat, tightness — and quickly predicting: anger. That prediction was based on past experiences, learned associations, and habit.
Sophie paused.
Instead of assuming anger was correct, she looked closer.
First, she labeled the sensations simply:
Tight chest
Flutter in stomach
Warm face
Then, she asked herself:
"Aside from the label 'anger,' what else could these sensations mean?"
As she sat quietly, memories surfaced. She remembered yesterday’s meeting where she hadn’t voiced her uncertainty about the project. There had been confusion, but she hadn’t spoken up. That moment of hesitation had left her feeling exposed.
Now, as the client rejected her work, her brain had interpreted those sensations as anger. But underneath was something closer to anxiety — the discomfort of not feeling in control, of fearing she hadn’t been clear enough.
Her brain had automatically predicted anger because it was easier to blame the client than to feel vulnerability.
Sophie realized:
The sensations were real.
The story was a guess.
The emotion was constructed.
She stayed with the sensations a little longer. They softened. The urgency to react dissolved.
Sophie saw that emotions weren’t fixed reactions imposed on her. They were stories built from bodily sensations, experience, and interpretation. By noticing this process, she wasn’t suppressing emotions — she was seeing how they arose.
The next time a strong emotion appeared, she knew what to do:
Pause.
Feel.
Notice the body.
Separate the story from the raw experience.
And in that space, clarity would arise.
Exercise: Seeing How Emotions Are Built
Purpose:
To gently observe how emotions arise from sensations and predictions.
When an Emotion Arises:
1️⃣ Pause.
Don’t try to suppress the feeling.
Don’t analyze yet.
Just pause and notice.
2️⃣ Locate the Sensations.
Where is this felt in the body?
Describe simply:
Tight chest? Fluttering stomach? Heat in the face? Tension in the jaw?
✏ Write them down if helpful.
3️⃣ Set Aside the Label.
Put aside the word (anger, fear, sadness).
Stay with the raw sensations as they are.
4️⃣ Ask:
"Aside from my usual label, what else could these sensations mean?"
Is there vulnerability?
Is there uncertainty?
Is there fatigue?
Is this reminding me of a past experience?
5️⃣ Watch the Story Forming.
Notice how quickly your mind tries to build a story:
"They don't respect me."
"I'm failing."
"I need to fix this."See the story as a guess — not a fact.
6️⃣ Rest in the Sensation.
Stay with the physical feeling directly.
Allow it to move, soften, or simply be.
7️⃣ Final Inquiry:
"Is this emotion something happening to a me — or is it simply experience arising?" …or
or to put it more accurately, “is it simply experiencing happening?”
For more pointers and suggestions, check out this link to vince-bot using the website as its knowledge base.
Vince Schubert YouTube Channel
Free online meetups every Saturday at 9 pm (Sydney Australia time)
and one each Monday 7 am ( Sydney Australia time)
and each Wednesday at 4 pm (Sydney Australia time)
and every Friday 7 am (Sydney time) - never published.
You can check your local time here:
Or visit the website for countdown timers to each meeting.
Please note that it's always the same time on the same link. Arriving late and leaving early is fine.
Click here to Join Zoom Meeting https://us02web.zoom.us/j/86991485768?pwd=WkIvNk9zS1Q0VlVMR3lENW12Um5DQT09
Here is a link to all of the published recordings.
Audio files can be found here:
There is also paid 1on1 (& also 2 on 1) guiding here: With vince &/or Marius
Although the website still requires a lot of work, there are resources here; WakingUpWithVince.com
..and more here; WakingUpWithMarius
Given the multitude of small costs (that add up to something significant) required to produce these offerings, please consider donating whatever you can comfortably afford. Moneys over and above running costs are directed to the establishment of Suan Jai Sanctuary. click here;
..and remember - lots of little bits make a big bit. ❤️